


The Price of Love

by batsy_rocks



Series: black + blue [16]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Superman - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bruce Wayne Needs a Hug, Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Canon Related, Canonical Character Death, Clark Kent is a Good Friend, Emotional Constipation, Emotional Hurt, Feels, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Grieving Bruce Wayne, Hurt No Comfort, Male Friendship, Tragedy, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-27
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:13:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22915300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/batsy_rocks/pseuds/batsy_rocks
Summary: Bruce had just lost his son in a brutal and horrific way and nothing Clark said or did would make a difference. Still, he had to try.
Relationships: Clark Kent & Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne
Series: black + blue [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1287215
Comments: 17
Kudos: 144





	The Price of Love

**Author's Note:**

> "Grief never ends...but it changes. It's a passage. Not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness. Nor a lack of faith...It is the price of love." - Elizabeth I (maybe?).

Gotham's sky was painted in different shades of gray as he flew through it, large dark clouds foreshadowing a heavy rain soon to come. It reminded Clark of a detail he noticed years ago and it was the fact sunlight never touched Gotham the way it did other cities. There was sun and heat in springs and summers, of course, but even then the sunlight here was different in a way he couldn't put into words. Almost as if the city somehow sought darkness and shadows even on sunny days, just like her dark protector always did.

Clark made sure to keep out of sight as he flew. With the things the media and people were saying about Batman, the last thing they needed was a Superman sighting in the city.

Once he reached the vast Wayne estate he headed straight to the cave under the Manor, letting the familiar steady beat of a heart guide him like a beacon. It hadn't been long since his last visit -if it could even be called that- and Clark was just as lost as he had been then.

He hovered outside one of the cave entrances for a moment, closing his eyes as he took a deep breath.

The cave was dark and silent aside from the sound of fluttering little wings and the waterfall, but Clark didn't even need to use any of his powers to find him. Bruce sat in front of the large bank of monitors, just like he had the last time he saw him. He was still wearing the suit, but it didn't look in as bad a shape as it had when Clark last saw it, and the smell of blood and sweat wasn't as strong, so Bruce must have showered at some point.

That was good. It was small, but it was progress.

The mess that had surrounded him then was gone as well, a couple of ignored food trays the only things out of place on the desk. Clark wasn't sure how he felt about Alfred or even Bruce taking the time to clean up in a moment like this, but he pushed the thought aside. What he thought or felt wasn't important right now, and if getting busy in some way helped them then it was good. He had done something similar before, even if it was under totally different circumstances.

Any other day, Clark would have no doubt Bruce was aware of his presence, but he couldn't be sure of that now so he floated closer, his red boots touching the ground with a muted sound at his best friend's side.

Clark had already spent hours and days thinking of the right thing to say and the best way to handle the situation. Trying to think of any way to help him. He spoke to his Ma and Lois at length and even talked with a priest, and yet nothing had really changed. Bruce had just lost his son in a brutal and horrific way and nothing he said or did would make a difference.

He may not know what he should do, but he knew what he shouldn't do, and leaving his best friend alone in a moment like this was the most important thing.

Clark raised a hand to place it on Bruce's shoulder but dropped it just before it made contact. He had to tread carefully less he was kicked out. Bruce could be unpredictable on the best of days and this was certainly not one of them. Far from it.

The kryptonian swallowed. "Hey, B."

There was no reply. In fact, there was no reaction whatsoever to the words or his presence. It had nothing to do with him and everything to do with Bruce and his grief and the way he was handling it, Clark reminded himself in the tense silence that followed. There was no point in beating around the bush, though. Bruce hated it when people did that almost as much as he hated when they asked if he was okay, and besides, this was no time for trivialities.

"Alfred mentioned you haven't gone upstairs in a while." Not since the funeral. Clark didn't say the words, but he could hear them echo loudly in the thick silence. "He's worried about you, B. We all are," Clark added just as softly.

Bruce remained silent, but the stiffness of his shoulders told him he was listening.

"Please, B."

 _"Don't,"_ Bruce rasped out, still not looking at him.

Clark thought about letting it go. About doing what Bruce was asking of him and simply offer him his silent comfort and quiet companionship, just like he had been doing for weeks now. But that had done nothing to help Bruce so far. Alfred's words and the worrisome increase in violence Batman was displaying told him that much.

Maybe it was time to stop thinking about what Bruce wanted and start thinking about what he _needed._

"I know I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through right now and I'm not going to pretend otherwise, but this needs to stop." Clark decided to continue without giving him time to speak. If he even decided to try, that is. "I'm not asking you to pretend you're alright, B. We both know you aren't and that's okay. I just- you can't keep doing this. You need to take care of yourself. You need to get out of here and-"

"I can't." Bruce shook his head.

"Of course you can, B. You-"

"He's there."

"I'm sorry?" Clark asked warily. He wouldn't be surprised to hear Bruce was already hallucinating with the lack of food and sleep. "He's in the Manor. Jason." Whatever expression Bruce saw on his face made him shake his head. "It's not like that. I'm- I see him. I see him in every room I walk into. I can hear his footsteps in the hallways and the sound of his laugh is always there."

Bruce's usually cold and collected tone was filled with too many emotions to name, but the desperation and grief were so sharp that they made his chest ache. Clark tried to imagine living with the ghost of someone he loved as elusive as smoke haunting him at every turn. No wonder Bruce was acting so erratically if he couldn't be at the Manor without being reminded of his dead son. It was no justification for Batman's violent behavior, but it made it somewhat understandable.

"But is worse when he isn't," Bruce continued, barely above a whisper. "When I look into his bedroom and find it empty. When he isn't in the kitchen helping Alfred or working on his homework. When the library is empty and I don't find bookmarked books waiting for him everywhere."

Clark looked away from the painful twitch of Bruce's lips and wiped his tears without a sound. He couldn't break down now. Not when Bruce needed him. He could do it later when he was on his own. He could cry for the pain his best friend was going through. Cry for a little boy who didn't deserve the tragic and painful way his life had ended far too soon.

If only he hadn't been off-planet when it happened. If only he had been here and- No. He couldn't go back to that. Not now.

"What about the cave?" He asked tentatively after a moment. How could Bruce spend all his time in the cave and yet couldn't be in the Manor?

"Robin belonged in the cave."

Clark was left at a loss for words once more. Surely separating Robin and Jason in that way wasn't healthy, but if Bruce needed that separation to cope with what happened...

"Why don't you come to the farm with me for a few days?" Bruce looked almost as surprised as Clark felt himself, but he knew it was a good idea as he looked at his friend's gaunt face and the new lines etched on it. His bloodshot eyes and the dark bruises under them. The unkempt hair and stubble covering the lower part of his face.

Clark had seen Bruce in a bad shape before, usually when he got lost working on cases or something went wrong, but nothing ever came close to this.

The Manor was a beautiful place, of course, and it was Bruce's home, but it was also a big and empty place, filled with too many ghosts old and new. Besides, he was sure his Ma would know the best way to help him. Them. There was no way he was leaving Alfred here by himself. "Some time away will be good for you, I think, and I'm sure Alfred would appreciate a change of scenery too."

Bruce shook his head. "No. I-"

"Please, B," He whispered. "Please let me help you."

Bruce's expression was unreadable as he met his gaze, his sunken and glazed eyes as sharp as always. 

Clark held his breath as he waited for his response even though he technically didn't need to breathe. What could he do if Bruce said no?

"Okay," Bruce said hoarsely, looking down at the keyboard with unseeing eyes.

Clark dared to put a hand on his shoulder then, feeling it quiver as he gentlyg squeezed. He didn't speak because there were no words that could express how sorry he was and how much he wished none of it had happened. Not that any of it would do any good.

He simply remained at Bruce's side and didn't let go.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is probably not even close to canon at all and maybe a bit OOC too and I don't care. I just needed to project a little. Sorry if its bad.
> 
> The thing is, I lost my beloved cat almost five months ago and this was the first thing I wrote a few months after it happened. I'm a very introverted person, so she was my baby and my best friend, and after spending more than half of my life with her her lost hit me really hard. That's why I haven't posted anything in so long. But, I still want to thank everyone for the comments and kudos my fics have received during that time. They mean a lot and I will reply as soon as possible. ❤️
> 
> Also, I haven't gone back to the drafts I was working on before (I usually write on my desktop and I've mostly stayed away from it so far) but I've started writing some new stuff on my phone, so I will be posting that and hopefully, I will go back to work on my old stories soon too.
> 
> English is not my native language, so any tips or corrections are welcome.


End file.
